Tibet

Tibet for the free..

A notch of anticipation grew in my stomach. I was not sure if it was the eternal smoke of the burning Laotian jungles or the fact we were headed back into the jaws of the red dragon, but something was stirring inside of me and it was about to rear its ugly head.

My last experience in China left me open, huge waves of questions and impressions swept me away, sending me somersaulting and grasping for air, leaving me vurnable and confused and I was going in for more…

The only difference this time was that I could no longer hide behind my ignorance, I knew this time I would have to make a choice.

The throngs of happy, red eyed tourists vanished. Our bus ploughed on, without kindness or understanding, North to the fabled Shangri-La, only the thoughts of slow, red sun afternoons with bare feet and cold beers lingered amongst the stale cigarette smoke and grinding noise.

With a screech and cheer we left the bus and squinted into the sun, the air was crisp and thin like a French delicacy. No one there to greet you, no one eager for your business, we headed for the closest taxi and in true tourist fashion asked the cabby if this was indeed the Shangri-La?? He just stared back, expressionless and thoughtless, it was only when in desperation we mentioned “Zhongdian?” did he finally register; you could almost hear the cogs and wheels groan and creak to life.” Silly us!”, the exact place where we stood was not Shangri-La, so there was still hope it  actually  existed, with this thought we jumped in and thank God he drove off.

We knew we were about to take a swim in the vast ocean of bureaucracy and shady dealings, we knew we did not have time on our side, we knew we were outnumbered and insignificant. I will not bore you with all the details, all the snorting and spitting, swearing and sweating, what I will tell you is that it was not easy. The Chinese were adamant and uncompromising, it seemed like they were testing our patience and bidding their time, alerting the lonely checkpoints that the pale faces might be coming soon. We rallied, and finally managed to get our hands on the mystical Alien travel permit that allowed us to travel to Lhasa. It was clear that we were not welcome and were seen as a threat. For those still in search of the mystical Shangri-La, I guarantee you this is not the place.

The sleepy wooden hotel moaned and creaked as we headed out for some pure sun and fresh air, the morning was crisp; my nostrils burned and struggled to take the pure air. We cherished the stillness and peace as we sat in the cafe clutching a hot drink watching the sleepy Shangri-La slowly awaken and slowly but slowly destroy our peace. Thoughts of Lhasa floated in between and pangs of anticipation prodded my body, I struggled to believe that in a couple of hours we would be on our way to Tibet.

The government agency guides smoked cigarettes and silently watched life go by. The shiny, landcruiser stood at attention and watched in silence as we greeted our guides and took care of last minute instructions. The driver was reserved and kept to himself always hiding behind the language barrier; the other was skinny and almost always looked confused.

These were the men we had entrusted with our lives and dreams. Soon, Shangri-La was a just a word in the cold oxygen starved air, the three of us sat in the back , snug as a bug in a rug, looking out and making the usual introductory banter, our guide slept in the back, he looked so peaceful… These guys had driven from Lhasa and now were on their home stretch… As we headed higher and higher we soon lost the horizon and the mountains crept in on both sides and the raging river scarred the valley… A steady smouldering river gushed at speed; we seemed so insignificant in its presence, insignificant altogether. Small towns appeared like mirages, two lines of houses with shops and life… The first few were a novelty, these frontier towns are full of the incredible mix of old and new, the shops windows are full of goodies for the people and the people were buying. Its only later that I would find out that most of the people who lived there were in the hands of the government and slowly but surely the Han Chinese creep West, as they have always tried to do, the push is relentless and the fight for the mountains and rivers continues.

Nature has demonstrated more than once that it bows to no king. The mountains soared into the sky and steadily the air got thinner and thinner, my body contorted with bouts of nausea as the road snaked and chicaned endlessly. As soon as we had a chance to stop we would bolt out of the landcruiser and hug that thin delicate air with all our hearts. This is truly the land of water, rivers gush from every direction and the roads are muddy and vulnerable, I can see why the Chinese are so keen on this piece of heaven. The mammoth lakes are simply a sight to behold; these Lakes are the pinnacles of perfection, endless imagination and true freedom. Like two tiny ants we walked along the turquoise shores and marvelled at Mother Nature. Not even in my wildest dreams could I dream of such colour and beauty, I was stunned. At one moment truly felt that, should I die tomorrow, I would die a richer man for having being here. No politics or permits, checkpoints and stupid clerks behind dirty windows could ever take this away from me.

All the hotels along the way insisted on seeing our Alien permits, the repercussions of been caught in the possession of uncertified Aliens were great, and the landlords obeyed to the last word. The rooms were damp and smelled of mothballs, the toilets were savage and the people totally closed and unapproachable, but we did not complain we were just happy to be still and silent… The days flew by, like they had a train to catch, leaving a cloud of dust in their wake. Slowly we approached Lhasa; I wondered if it was possible to impress me anymore, I wondered how many more moments on this journey would take my breath away. I soon realised that these moments are endless, if you really want you can have as many as you wish. Along the way, I had seen immense beauty and sadness together, living in perfect harmony, I had seen the proud Han conquering and carrying on their proud heritage, taking their culture and way of life to far off places and letting their name be known. Watching the Tibetans on their pilgrimages to the Holy city filled me with immeasurable inspiration, it captivated my imagination and I could taste true freedom, I could also see their pain and loss, they were fighting a losing battle and the casualties were mounting up… Buddha was clearly with these people, the word of their Lord made them invincible and a fire burned hot in their souls.

The Potala rose out of the dust, shimmering and radiant. The fake wooden Tibetan houses morphed into colossal concoctions, Red robes and colourful coats danced in unison on the busy roads, I watched in silence , I was shocked, I reassured myself that any moment the mystical Lhasa would appear. Sadly, it didn’t… There was an air of anticlimax as we said goodbye to our guides and checked into our Hotel.  We were quiet and barely spoke, we both needed time to get our thoughts in order, to adjust to the busyness, to realise that the Han were at the gates and it would not be long before the Tibetans would disappear into the pages of dusty history books. I was determined not to let this get me down, I realised that I would do my best to pass the word and make sure to tell as many people about this incredible people and breathtaking land.

We did discovered small parts of the real Lhasa, nookies and crannies that still burnt strong with the spirit of the Tibetans. We spoke to many Tibetans, in hushed tones in small tea houses in dark alleyways. As we the sounds of Lhasa lulled us to sleep I could smell the incense on my skin and yak fat in my breath, I was sorry I was not born in a different time, I was jealous of the people who were lucky enough to see this place in its full glory, I was angry that this vibrant culture was dying. I knew I was lucky, I knew there was no way I was going to take it for granted that I was here and it was not dream, I truly felt what it is like to live your dreams.